Sunday, April 29, 2012

Recovery is like becoming a submerged horse


To keep up with my horse metaphor and since I keep whining so much about the recovery process, let's talk about the little I've read/heard on the topic. Trying to recover from Cushing's is like being a sea horse instead of a unicorn. Or a mermaid! What do I know about being above water? Very little and those people above water don't know how to pull me back up either. They might catch a snag or two. I've read that Sarcoidosis or other immune recovery syndromes have been noted after surgery. From what I gather, it's the immune system overreacting after being suppressed for so long. It may attack itself. I get red bumps from time to time. Maybe I'm allergic to myself so to speak. Also, every time I read about symptoms I still have I see hypothyroidism. I'm continuing to notice a difference in taste and smell. My smell is more acute and I sometimes experience phantom smells? I already explained that things taste a little less appealing. This can be a sign of headaches, vitamin deficiency, or hypothyroidism. Insomnia can be a sign of hypothyroidism. Seeing the pattern? I'm starting to think the thyroid gets all the attention! The adrenals and other endocrine organs don't have a chance. If someone ever asks you if you have a thyroid problem, check your other glands!!  Perhaps I don't have a low thyroid, but all these diseases I've listed are commonly mentioned as something that happens after Cushing's. I hear the word Hashimoto's thrown around the Cushie community often, too. That's a hypothyroid thing. I just hope my Endo is going to consider these things in the future, especially because I have a sister with similar qualities. Plenty of digestive and other issues have been  reported, as well. Stomach ulcers, gastroenteritis- to name a few. There is practically no information on this matter. It's no wonder I get edgy sometimes despite successful surgery as far as we can tell. If you think having it is rare, try getting over it. Because what I hear people complain about the most is it coming back, or experiencing continuous problems anyway. I don't feel like I have the whole me back. I was just so relieved at first to not feel like crying every 10 minutes, being able to concentrate at a much higher level, and getting my even-keeled voice back. I don't mean to be bitter, but I sometimes have dreams about the past when I should look to the future. I remember when things made sense, when I made sense. Recovery is a no bounds area. I don't know anything aside from the sea floor now and it's kind of lame here. In conclusion, I give an un-hearty smirk when someone asks if I'm better. I need another pamphlet altogether for that answer. Another Cushie was complaining that nobody keeps track of your progress after surgery. How are they supposed to know what recovery is like? It's a good point. No doctor has had ANY advice.

(I think this is actually just some person's paper. At least they are taking the time to consider this issue since as I've said before, I haven't seen many doctors doing it in general if at all...)

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